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This night was an immersive play in 4 acts and also a social experiment. The first two acts were unfortunately not documented due to organizational issues. But they remain in my memory and I’m sure also in the memories of those who were there that night.
I had a lot of people approaching me and telling me nice things, like that what I do is real art. It felt good at first. But then I saw how the money jar started filling up with coins, notes and.. business cards.
This part made me sad somehow. So I’d like to leave questions here. Why do some people think that their opinion is worth more than a few euros? Or is there something wrong with me?
I’m only here to bring up the questions no else can. That’s my power. The rest is yours.
That night I went to the club neither to not judge nxor ruin the party mood. I think I wanted answers for myself. I got them and feel grateful.
(Dear Manuel, thank you for your patience and will to make it work).
I learned so much that night
My brave sub was that night both a candle holder and a message carrier. I used their body to hold my laptop and display text slides. They also talked to the guests, played, and explained the slides to them, though at certain moments, this wasn’t an easy task at all.
Here you can see the slides that they displayed.
They also wrote this poem after. I think it can partially replace the missing pictures.
Massive thanks to Let’Z Fetish Academy at Kitkatclub Berlin and Ari Denaro personally for letting me take care of the clinic, special thanks to Simon for rescuing the photographer for me, and to Elina and Lilith for being amazing, supportive, but also mean and hot AF!
My laptop de-branding sticker was designed by Maladie_tattoo.
MONEY SECTION
All the money collected that night went to support Ukrainians. If you read until this point I wonder if you are curious about how much money we actually got.
I will tell you, I promise. But first I’m asking you to guess the number that you thin it is. Once you submit your guess, you’ll get the answer. What do you think of it?
(The offer is expired. No IRL meeting requests (update from 1.06.2024))
This post is primarily a photo gallery. To read more about us, you can click here for information.
I bet you want to see more of J’s photos, right? I would too. Enjoy!
J is a new-age geisha who loves to play as much as she loves to do shamanic sessions. She specializes in femdom, impact and wax play, electro games, and ropes.
Maybe we’ve piqued your curiosity?
There are so many ways to get to know J. Maybe you’d like a spanking? Or a tea ceremony, perhaps. Or both at the same time?
And since we’re here, here are a few photos of me as well, seeing as our collaborative offer is posted now
Most of the content I created last night was video and it needs to be processed. This post is just a pile of data available at the moment and my typical gratitude to the audience and people who have trusted me in other waysOn the menu we had candles and sessions. In addition, we performed blind temperature sensitivity tests and collected lots of fun data. I’m impressed. But we need more data.Of course, one other person touched me because I’m so sweet and naked and everything is love. Of course, that person was taken to our sweet and friendly security team upstairs. I feel like we should talk about rules more often and not when someone has already slapped my arse while I was closing my bags at 6 am. Way before.I’m not sure I want to run a Telegram channel again, but it seems the Berlin crowd is using it one way or another. For now, I try to keep you up to date with Mastodon’s help. At least with nudes and online events.
Evil candles will land in Ari‘s collection. Nice to see KitKat thriving and fucking again. Video is coming, but first I need to sleep more and share the energy I got with other SWs tomorrow.
I try to keep you up to date with Mastodon’s help. At least with nudes and online events.
I have no pictures on my phone from last Saturday and half of the performance that I did that night unfortunately was not documented at all.
However.
slides from the performance on 25.02.2023 at Kitkatclub Berlinslides from the performance on 25.02.2023 at Kitkatclub Berlinslides from the performance on 25.02.2023 at Kitkatclub Berlin
That night for sure is going to stay in my memory and most likely in the memory of others who witnessed the show. Some pictures are coming for sure, but later. Today I only give you a chance to see how Gene was seeing me in the last few days. I have to say, I’m feeling inspired and refreshed.
As if we got one step closer to overthrowing capitalism and killing putin at the same time.
leather chain by Danilov Harnessoriginally this was a skirtbut I mostly wear it on my chestI got this item as a gift from a lover from DniproI’m wearing it weekly for already more than a yearthe quality is quite good!I’ll show you more ways of using it soonsupport Ukranian fetish brands
I’m very grateful to my colleagues from Let’Z Fetish academy and Ari Denaro specifically for letting me do my art and supporting me in my craziness.
ALSO! A huge thanks to Ben for being so helpful and brave, sorry I burned your wiener!
Another gallery of pictures where I’m already a lot more dressed shows the process of packing and signing candles. I don’t buy any special package material, all candles are packed and signed by me, and with packing materials that were already in use.
Gene has a few more candles in Berlin for picking up. The store is close to being launched. Now preparing drops for Paris and London and can accept 1-2 custom orders.
That’s more or less it for now and the train is almost arriving in Prague. Thanks for reading me.
(CW: nudity, self reflection from march 2022 written a year after)
Let’s begin with the reflection session results this time. I started with taking pictures. I tried different angles, but the look from the bottom seems to be one of my favorites.
In the process, I decided to spank myself a little. Mostly to make that slow-mo video, but also to get a reminder about the sensations that I give to others. It felt good.
Another video was originally just to choose some snap-shots from, but I like how real I am there.
Now let’s get to the story I have after reflecting on March 2022
Pain and pleasure essentially are the same thing. Sensations. Sometimes we forget about this fact. But it’s all in our heads. I had a painful butt for a week in March, and I enjoyed every day of it hurting just because it was my decision to get that damage.
We humans are very funny creatures indeed. Every time I sat down I was feeling the pain, but I liked it, and even now, after almost a year I feel a lot of positive emotions about that pain. No memories attached, really. It just felt good.
It was a roller coaster month otherwise. I had absolutely incredible experiences, and the darkest moments of this year as well, all mixed up.
I started Patreon, but kept writing in russian, and even though I already understood that it had to stop, I kept following the old program. I guess I was just not able to not write about some things.
On the positive side – I got better at finding adventures for my ass. I met Ari and started using Fetlife. More of my fantasies became actions. For the first impact play workshop, I chose to go for a switching session, and not only tried all popular spanking devices that are offered by Let’Z Fetish Academy at Kitkatclub but got a nicely bruised butt with exactly the same choice of tools back. The results you can see below.
But this was my fun life
My real life continued falling apart. Most of my income directly involved russia. I had a European franchise business there, I was consulting on marketing and business strategy, basically, I was a bridge between the modern western world, where I lived and consumed information, and the post-Soviet purgatory, that had just opened the gates to hell.
Balancing those two lives brought me questions.
Which one is real?
Which one should be real?
Can I make a living out of blogging about all this?
The concept of the blog I had before seemed like a setup to failure. (I had about 8000 followers of russian-speaking audience on Instagram, where I was posting about keto food and open marriage experiences, but that was more of a side project for me to digest emotions and feel seen.)
What do I have to offer? I knew I like to be seen, and I like to interact with an audience. I was craving the excitement of playing with them, and being in control of the game. I fantasized about the attention of many. Not necessary to like me. But to notice me. Acknowledge me Feel something. But fantasies and reality are not easy things to connect, so I’m glad I believed in myself enough to follow the art of small steps and explore what it brings.
launching Patreon was not a spontaneous desigion. I blogged already for a few years (in Russian of course) on InstagramI liked blogging, but I didn’t want to be trapped in one platformThe adventures of my ass continued, I was crazy to share that experience with other, my audience in the blog I had back then wasn’t ready to see the next pictureThat’s not how popular Instagram content looks like. At least from the perspective of the majorityHere I’m celebrating the launch of Patreon and still trying to ignore the language issue I’m trapping myself inMoments of sadness are there too, but I keep planing adventures, just with a sad facecat recovered after covid and went into siren mode screaming at the door every day. So I took him for a walk along the wallthe bruises are with me for the rest of the monthI start playing with different cameras and my head start generating ideas for cam showsSharing the lovers with other lovers turns out to be extra fun. But not without dramaone of the sunny mornings, when I woke up and started writing a text right awayThe world is falling apart, but at least I’m taking care of myselfGene is just being fabulous and always there to help with my dramaAm I a pimp now? Do I like this idea? Fuck yesMe and the cat looking into the future with hopetelling Gene about my pimping career and bruised buttHard to explain why this picture makes me smile, but it does and it reflects the mood I had in March 22, so here it stays
This party definitely deserves a longer story. It was a private party with free entrance. Someone just bought the basement and us as entertainment. The first gallery and videos are mine. Below there is another gallery by Elad Itzkin Photography.
One of my first nights alone in Kitkat’s basement and this couple really made it cheesy hot!
They were happy to have pictures and a session with me, and I felt like I did things right that night. I’m especially grateful for the permission to publish the very exact moments. It was a pleasure to meet you guys!
Huge thanks to Ari for the trust to keep Let’Z Fetish station warm and safe.
UPD. Now looking back at this night I feel the need to add a remark, expressing how uncertain I was at that moment with everything else in my life. That was the role where I could feel confident and appreciated. For the beginner me it meant the world.
I think I can pretty much call that a career choice acceptance moment. Once again, thanks to everyone involved. I’m glad to have my perverted family growing every day.
My palms are sweaty and heartbeat elevates when I´m typing this text. This feeling of excitement and anticipation. I absolutely love it.
I guess things could never happen in any other way. This post is about the real day One: when I´m kinda going to work and my job will be spanking everyone´s butts. How awesome is that?
Of course, the story hasn´t started yesterday. But before a was just a trainee visiting the club, then things kinda escalated and thanks to Ari Denaro I ended up being in charge of the dungeon for the very first time. Tonight.
Having this event on the first weekend of pride month is a special pleasure on top of that. I know it´s July in Germany, but I can´t care less. Pride month should be every month.
See you in KitkatClub tonight! Join us for workshops and sessions with Let´Z Fetish academy, let’s keep the place safe and kinky together.
