Category: Public post

  • Dates announcement Dec / Jan

    Update: posted in Prague Meetups on Fetlife

    I provide more info on social media closer to the event dates. Please mind the rules of the location and my own: don’t assume, ask.

    I’m open to collabs in Prague and Berlin, reach out with your ideas and available dates to sil@sicut-dico.com

    December:

    22.12.2022 Psychokitkatclub, Berlin, (Bible reading sessions, premier);

    23.12.2022-25.12.2022 Artsy meetup in Berlin, (locations TBA; kinksters welcome);

    24.12.2022 Let’Z Fetish – Academy​​, Berlin, (Bible reading sessions on demand);

    29.12.2022 Atelier, Prague (Bible reading, sessions) – as planned so far, special guest: Bogolepova.

    January: ?! Possible change of date, TBA soon.

    08.01.2022 Engels, Berlin

    Preaching event with Bogolepova. Kinksters friendly event

    FREE EVENT * / Donations welcome

    * registration needed! Please email us in order to secure a place on the guest list. by writing to this email (newsletter[at]bogolepov.eu) you confirm that you agree to receive emails from us

  • Naked mirror selfie

    I have tons of those pictures on my phone. Taking nude selfies appears to be good practice for me, it helps with my mood.

    Today I had a very unpleasant Monday with very unsexy business, and I’m not saying that nudes can fix that, but it’s a good distraction for me now. Plus I’ll use this series of selfies as an example to explain more about how I deal with the content.

    This text as a full story will be only available to the patrons, but bits of it I’ll throw to different social media because I want people to understand how things work.

    All the content first goes to this website. In this case, I have complete control of it, also I can lock parts of content behind the paywall and by that express my gratitude to you, the people who support me. It’s also about trust. You trust me with your money, I trust you to see everything raw.

    So here we have a gallery of 40 pictures and a video that I made of them quickly.

  • Atelier 01

    Painful Thursday’s season is open!

    Last night was my first evening with the oldest local BDSM club and I stayed until the very end of the evening. Absolutely in love with Katka and her BDSM pub with playrooms and a concert hall.

    This is the fastest post on the website whatsoever! Less than 24 hrs from the events. Very proud of myself, thank you all for the motivation. Below are the videos and a few of my notes to myself after last night. Enjoy!

    Note 1. Next time I need to bring some cleaning supplies if more waxplay is happening.

    Note 2. Filming and flogging at the same time is wrong. But fun.

    Note 3. I have a weak heart for french cats.

    3 minutes chronological order:

    45 sec for social media:

  • Atelier 01 (full photo gallery)

    Now you know where to find me on Thursdays in Prague.

    Sil found this place on the internet. But one of my friends told me about it too. So we wrote them an email and met the management. And yesterday I finally met the audience!

    It felt like a very fast night, I had home-like tasting food, pet one very cuddly kitty after, looked at some bloody nudes on someone’s phone, while testing new candles and the playground equipment, and had a lot of sugar-free mate. I felt safe and welcome. I hope we cleaned after the wax-play well enough, I promise to be less messy in the future!

    We will organize an event in this place in March. Something very queer.

    Follow me on FetLife for events and dates announcements. If you live in Prague and would like to collaborate with me, send an email to sil@sicut-dico.com.

    For my patrons there’s another post with 3 minutes of video where I play with candles and try to whip the person and film at the same time. Works so-so, looks funny though.

  • team and friends

    UPD 22.03.2023

    I was postponing this post for a while because I wanted it to be perfect. But friendship is not about being perfect, it’s about staying in touch and helping each other to move forward.

    Same for teamwork. This post continues the “about me” storyline. I don’t function without people. And I decided to start with one, who is getting more helpful every day and making the blog finally live its life. I hope this post will get her some appreciation that she deserves.

    Say hello to Sil!

    Sil, photo by Whiteorcherstra

    Sil is my assistant. We met on tinder, and she is fantastic! She covers my calendar, content production flow, supplies for our candle factory, brings food, and gives me massages. The bitter part about Sil – she is a refugee from Ukraine with children and our work is… let’s call it hectic. So we try to structure the task flow and use email for this purpose a lot.

    Btw if I took pictures of you during our session and you still didn’t get them, or we have another kind of unfinished business – please send your request to

    sil@sicut-dico.com

    This post is only to start mentioning the people who help me to create this blog and make other things happen. For now, I just list them and link their websites or social media, if such exist, and later I’ll tell you more about each one of them one by one:

    NAMES

    In November, when this post was published and I only started working with Sil – we were preparing to survive the hell season for me.

    This time I was somehow extra irritated by the hallmark teddy bear postcard aesthetics and ended up asking people on social media: if they could create their own kind of postcards that reflect their true feelings, what would they write on that postcard? What would be The Message to send or to receive?

    I got a lot of different answers. Way too many to pick one or 10. So the solution was obvious to me.

    The best message is the one that works for you. So it had to be personal.

    Image drawn by Sil’s daughter on one of my notes and used as a base for the postcard generator, which is going to be available to play with on canbed.one

    Since I like to make things complicated you won’t get the full story of this project right away. Here I only introduce a new team member – Sasha Whiteorcherstra, welcome on board! Soon Sasha will explain the details behind the image on the postcard and perhaps some other mysteries too.

    Thanks for watching!

  • pillow talk with antiShanti

    I met Shanti through the kitkatclub’s dungeon master, Ari, and on the first evening, she taught me how to make a handle for a human.

    Questions for Shanti I gathered from my Instagram audience and one of the popular ones was – how do the scars from body suspensions look like? Here is the answer from Shanti’s back.

    The Pillow talks idea was one of the most ambitious this year, I thought I’d make them once a month. Haha. The next one should be with Ari Denaro, btw. let’s see. Below you can see the key topics with time stamps, and links to videos that I used from Shanti’s Vimeo account.

    This conversation was recorded in two 20 min pieces in my study in Berlin with 10 minutes break, my idea was to make it fast and real. It’s definitely real, I didn’t cut off much material. The “fast” part obviously leaves room for improvement.

    From my pimping side, I’d like to inform you about options to use my service to book a workshop, session, or a show with Shanti in Berlin or Prague, if you need a partner or want to be tied up you can also leave your contact here, or simply write your request to booking@sicut-dico.com. If you are too shy for all that, at least follow her on Insta.

    • 0:30 – introduction
    • 1:30 – ropes or hooks?
    • 6:00 – the difference between traditional shibari and rope art
    • 7:30 – workshop introduction
    • 8:30 – different ropes for different sensations
    • 11:00 – workshop levels and my personal experience
    • 13:00 – about partners for workshops
    • 16:00 – workshops for advanced levels
    • 17:30 – jumps and suspension with hooks
    • 18:00 – Shanti’s first jump and personal experience 
    • 19:30 – rope jumping team
    • 20:30 – how to begin or watch others 
    • 23:45 – scars
    • 25:00 – social media info

    videos used for the background: RopeFest 2020, STILL FALLING FOR YOU ’20 Ropes for Aleksa, Amplitude jump. The Sinner Team, 2010 – all from https://vimeo.com/sashashanti

  • Born weird

    CW: longread, russia, strong personal opinion, (+ full gallery unedited Milk bath by Kay Hues)

    I was born in Siberia, in a town with 700 000 population, but so conservative that the word “bisexual” I learned somewhere in my twenties already in Saint-Petersburg.

    While living in my hometown, I knew that there are gays and lesbians, and both things are “bad”, I knew that I didn’t fit into both, nor did I fit into “normal” teen society. I didn’t call them straight people back then. I didn’t have the concept yet. I just knew: I didn’t fit. I could feel it almost every day. 

    Snowboarders accepted me somehow when I was around 12-13 and, damn, it was a great part of my life since then! I was I weirdo, but thanks to snowboarding – I was a cool one. Also hanging out with older cool snowboarders made me an unpleasant target for bullies. Not without my help of course.

    Very early I learned to use reputation instead of actual fists and to anticipate the fight or start it first but on my own terms instead of ignoring or avoiding possible attacks on my weirdness.

    Back then I hated it. The weirdness I mean. I WANTED SO FUCKING MUCH TO BE JUST NORMAL. But I couldn’t. I couldn’t understand why everyone is so serious and fixed on their gender roles.

    Why should I date guys if I’m attracted to girls too?

    Is it just me?

    What happens if they know that I’m pretending to be one of them, but I’m actually not?

    Why do I feel so much? 

    The only thing keeping me sane throughout my first 16 years of life was traveling and my mom helping me to see the world. She was taking me to different countries and different places abroad. Not just to resorts and beaches, but to capitals, museums, flea markets, theatres, and other places where I could interact with different cultures.

    The magical part about this kind of traveling was that I also realized quite early – weird is not always bad. The world is huge and full of different things.

    I was far from accepting my own weirdness, but I could enjoy the weirdness of other people. And It was giving me hope. 

    When I turned 17 I moved “to the cultural capital” as I liked to call it back then. It was 2003, and it felt amazing after the village where I grew up.

    The bookstore on Nevsky had more than 5 kinds of gay magazines. No one gave a fuck. I was however very confused about my personal interest in gay magazines.

    They WERE CLEARLY NOT MEANT FOR ME. Why was I so attracted then?

    If I ever write a proper memoir, the chapter about my life in Saint Petersburg should probably be called:

    ME, TRYING TO LIVE A NORMAL LIFE, AND FAILING AT EVERY STEP.

    To some people’s standards, I could even call myself successful. I got my first flat. Then another one. I worked in the fashion industry and met some famous people. I had a relationship. Nice one to some people’s standards.

    But I was utterly unhappy. It all just felt wrong.

    Fake. Sad and pointless. 

    As if I didn’t live my life, but someone else’s.

    Photos by Kay Hues

  • Another update from train

    Had very intense and warm 2 days with amazing people! 82 minutes of porn content to process, 2 ‘save the date’ announcements to make, still one birthday to celebrate.. not sure if I can and should list everything. The point of this post is mostly to help me getting used to posting here. And one more thing:

    DEAR PATRONS! I gave you candles and didn’t take pictures of them or wrote down what I gave to whom… If you could send me pictures of what you got or post it and tag me, I’ll be very grateful. Thank you!

  • Who owns the world?

    Trigger warning: suicide thoughts mentioned.

    When I was a kid, I thought the world belongs to adults. At least adults behaved like it’s true: they could make their own decisions and had the authority to tell others what to do. I wanted to be one.

    Later I started thinking that the world belongs to men. Or at least they behaved as if it did belong to them. I even joined their shitty competition for success and wealth. For a bit, it actually felt like money can give me the power to shift that balance. But I never managed to have enough to fully feel it. I got stuck in limbo, I could literally watch how it got harder and harder to earn money (because that’s how capitalism works), so my self-esteem for a while was tightly attached to my income. If I was successful – I felt like I deserve my place in the world, but I could never stabilize this status. I felt like I’m running behind the train, I still could see it, but I couldn’t catch it.

    The worst part was always: dealing with authorities. Anyone official with the power to question me was making me feel small and insignificant. It never stopped me from getting things done, I started my own business when I was 19 and didn’t bribe a single person while running multiple companies in Russia for more than 10 years. Or 15? Depends on how we count, it’s kinda a lot anyway. This whole time I felt like I had to prove myself worthy almost every fucking day. What a cute idiot I was, huh?

    When I left Russia, I thought it would be over. But different issues appeared. In Germany: I didn’t speak German, I didn’t have a proper job (I’m self-employed my whole life), didn’t have a single paper about my education (everything I know I’ve learned by myself). Once again I felt like an imposter, that must prove the opposite as soon as possible, or I’ll be expelled.

    I have had suicidal thoughts since I’m 20. I never tried to kill myself just because I know that I’ll succeed. I’m too afraid of causing pain to people who care for me. And I was always lucky enough to have a lot of them in my life, so I keep breathing.

    I’m telling you all this not to ask for your pity. This is my way of fighting back. I don’t want to show you my strong side without introducing you to the weak one first.

    I had no idea that I was an HSP. People were telling me, that I was too emotional, and taking things too personally, getting angry over nothing, and creating drama where there is none… Don’t get me wrong: people keep telling me this also now. The difference is that now I know that it’s not me who is broken, it’s the world. This small knowledge changes so much.

    If you are struggling with suicidal thoughts, please seek out help, here is the link. And please remember: You are not alone.

    I’ll be unfolding the pain of dealing with some very basic things, like bureaucracy and… well, how to phrase it? Capitalism, I guess. I wish to let you see how it ALL feels.

    What I am offering you here is to look into my soul along with my crotch. I wonder how many of you are actually brave enough to do this in the long run. I can promise to sweeten the pill with some hot and pervy content that I create for my Patrons. Since this creative process actually makes me feel whole.

    As if the world belongs to me.

    This is the first post out of 10 that I prepared to be available for free on this website and will publish by the end of the year. Besides personal stories and nudes, there will be an interview about ropes and hooks with Shanti, my first private-play-almost-porn video, short clips from my club sessions, 20 minutes of me doing naked yoga on my legendary balcony in Berlin, and some other weird stuff that I find interesting.

    Follow me on social media for updates, share my posts, and spread the word about my project if it speaks to you. I want to be seen. I’m ready.

    Let’s get to the crotch part already!

    My husband took those pictures of me and my cat in our Berlin flat when one of my lovers wanted to borrow some outfits and I volunteered to model. I edited a few of them first, but then I questioned myself: what for? I hope you appreciate this kind of intimacy. 

    thank you for your attention, support me on Patreon to unlock other content 😉

    your Sicut

  • Social media statement

    The world of social media is way too fucked up to take it seriously.

    This website is my main resource and the best way to stay updated about new posts here is to send me a blank email to newsletter@sicut-dico.com

    All social media accounts are run by me and if you behave nicely I’m totally reachable.

    Mastodon is my favorite bubble, for now, so I feed it with nudes from time to time.

    Accounts on Instagram and Reddit are mirroring this website. I don’t generate content for them. I still like to connect with people there but keep in mind, I’m highly allergic to unwanted advice and stupidity.

    You can follow me on Chaturbate to get for sure notified when I’m online.

    For specific fetish events, requests, and more info on how to serve me go to Fetlife (friend requests accepted from people that I met IRL only).